“I speak in the present tense because for us time does not exist, only space. And because it seems only yesterday.”
Saturday, February 6, 2010
Disguised ignorance
I can think of only one word, and that is ignorance.
The week passed in a boring way.
2nd was S.Pal’s birthday. I didn’t go to the college. In the noon, I watched a film on Jim Corbett on Discovery channel, became amazed by the same, and that too, to an extent which made me go to the Golpark library and read a book written by him, named ‘The man-eaters of Kumaon’. And afterwards, ate two chicken pakoras at Golpark(Bedwin). Came back home walking through SA.
1st, 3rd, and 5th were Monday, Wednesday, and Friday respectively. Had classes. Still hate that.
Saw a boy and a girl eating something filthy out of a plastic bag on the other day at Garia staion. There is no escape from this poverty.
Now as I sit at the corner of my bed, and keep looking at my mobile and wait for a short ringing or something(don’t know what else could be), listening to newly released hindi film songs, I can hardly forget the words of the clairvoyant.
I feel I should copy something from my diary of 2009, 3rd August to be specific.
“I ignore her. I ignore her when I talk with my friends sitting beside me, or when I laugh with them. I ignore her when she looks at me casually, or pretending the casual way. I smile several times looking at people I've never talked to but I never look at her. She becomes frustrated. She turns back to me, starts to look at me in a way that makes me look at her. I say hello in a mocking way, as she doesn’t answer. Rather, she says something that stuns me.
“It seems you do not notice me at all in the class.” She says.”
Catastrophe.
Sis is going to come over to our place tomorrow. Lot’s to catch up with, at least for her. Neice is growing by each day. Activities too, in the way of a steep curve. Love to spend time, just by watching her.
14th is the V-day. Not an important day for me, though. I was just thinking about something else. If I could finish the writing ‘A few moments I stood beside her’, I would publish it on the very day. Will be a gift to her from me, irrespective of the fact that she will be hardly aware of the present, given the fact that I finish it in time.
It’s a bad habit. Doing so much chat in g-talk(another software that allows you to talk with friends online). Always feel like using smileys. Could be anything like :) or :(.They are cute, aren’t they?
Still waiting to find the right choice. God is smiling all the time. Is the omen ever going to come?
Dreamt about grandma. Called her today, and talked to. Reminded about the days I was in Midnapur. I miss both of my grandparents. Sometimes, situations arise when chahte hue bhi tum kisi ko dekh nehi sakte, or may be uske sathh baithh ke do bateein bhi nahi kar sakte.
Nothing else to say, really. Just wanted to write about the neighbour-colony girl. She will have her own preferences, of course. That is what I should accept now. This applies to both the girls, in fact.
Let's see if I can finish ‘A few moments…’ before 14th.
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